Don't know much about Ecuador - but here we are - after a quick jaunt up the Pan American Highway Norte - or Ruta 1N as the locals call it - we're at Huaquillas - border country.
There's a lovely new highway for the last 10km to the border - best bit of road in the whole of Peru - and not a Tuk-Tuk in sight! Weird border though - we pull in to a huge compound on the border and toddle off to get our Passports stamped - only to be told we're in the wrong place - so have to drive 5 miles into Ecuador to an identical compound - most of which is taken up by cafes selling snacks and beer - not to those crossing the border, but to local Ecuadorians who have come for a day out to watch those crossing the border - and who have occupied all the parking spaces in the compound.
So we park on a yellow line and head for Immigration - only to be yelled at by a Policeman in paramilitary camo uniform carrying a big gun - no parking!! I practice my Anglo Saxon vocabulary on him, but he's not chatty! First encounter with the Ecuador Policia not a good omen!!
Follow the signs for Immigration and come to a booth with tinted windows - tap tap - officious woman slides back the glass and barks something in Espanol pointing back up the compound past the row of cafe tables also fully occupied by the Ecuadaorian voyeurs.
Back we go and find another set of signs to Immigration - no sweat, it's only 34 degrees and 100% humidity! So in we go to a small room with 4 glass fronted booths inside which 4 bored Border Agents sit - ignoring the queue of bored Border Crossers. We join the shortest queue, only to be told by another Policeman with a big gun we're in the wrong place - he points to another queue by a desk on the other side of the room. Over we go - only to be told after 2 minutes to go back to the first queue where the bored Border Agent has finished checking his WhatsApp messages, put his sour face back on, and is ready to scrutinise our Passports for 15 minutes whilst glaring at us like we are Bonnie & Clyde seeking sanctuary in his South American fiefdom! Meanwhile the queue behind us is growing!!
Sour Face points to the booth next to his and tells us in Espanol to join the queue for the next bored Border Agent where Mrs Sour Face is chatting to a colleague - probably about last night's episode of Este Terminadors! Must be shift change - 2:00pm - and we've been crossing the border for an hour already! Mrs Sour Face is replaced by Miss Sour Face who has some admin to do before she can start her shift. Just as she opens up shop Mr Local Trucker pushes into the front of the queue waving his Ecuadorian Passport and makes to be first in line for rubber stamping. I tap him on the shoulder and point out that there's a queue of 30 people waiting for Miss Sour Face and he should get to the other end of the line. He shrugs, ignores my advice and shoves his Passport through the slot. Miss Sour Face couldn't give a damn and after 5 minutes keyboard tapping stamps Local Trucker in to Ecuador.
We get the Bonnie & Clyde glare as Miss SF checks every page of our Passports and holds them up to the light to see if they are forgeries. I remind her it's Ecuador we are entering, not Donald Trump's USA but she doesn't understand sarcasm. Eventually both our Passports are stamped and we're told we can only stay in Ecuador for a maximum of 90 days! 9 days would be plenty thanks, if the rest of your country is as friendly as you are!!!
We're stamped in but what about Pablo - we have to get his Temporary Import Permit (TIP). Follow the signs to Aduana and enquire within about Vehiculo Importacion - a very friendly Customs Officer with a big gun - gabbles away in Espanol and points back down the compound to where the officious women sit behind tinted glass windows - great!!
Officious woman number 1 points to officious woman number 2 who points to a series of doors round the back of the building. Door 1 is the toilet. Door 2 is Ecuadorian Aduana - but he points to Door 3 where 4 Peruvian Customs Officers are squished into a small office. I show them Pablo's TIP for Peru and they look at it like they've never seen one of those before! Twenty questions are fired at me and I have to explain that although Pablo is from Chile, I am from Inglaterra - much consternation ensues! Once I've been to fetch Pablo and parked him where the Customs Officials can see him - back on the Yellow Line - all is well and the TIP is logged onto Peru's GCHQ equivalent mainframe - Pablo has left the country! Now back to Door 2 where the Ecuadorian Customs Official tells me to go back to the officious women behind the tinted glass windows. Officious woman number 2 points to officious woman number 3 who asks me for Padron, Passport, Driving Licence and after giving me a scrap of paper on which to write my e-mail address slams the glass window shut.
I chat away with the dozen or so Ecuadorian Truck Drivers who are waiting for their cargoes to be inspected - mostly "Buenos Tardes" & "Hola", but soon we're on good terms and cracking jokes about the officious women behind the glass. At least I think that's what they are saying when they look over at me and chuckle!?
Finally the glass hatch slides open and Pablo's TIP for Ecuador is thrust out for signature. Officious woman number 3 advises me that Pablo only has 90 days in the country and to make sure we are gone by then. Feeling like 89 of those days have already elapsed I nod and with a "Si" take Pablos TIP, thank the three Officious Women in my best Anglo-Saxon, wave to the paramilitary Policeman with a big gun, jump in the car and get the hell out of there! Pausing briefly to pick up Amanda from Cafe Central we head out onto the E25 Highway.
It's been three hours! Welcome to Ecuador!!!
